Post-Capitalism: Intrinsic Motivation: Finding mine in school

I had this theory that the universe was based on randomness and duplication. If this were true it would make sense that the two things that would help me thrive would be the motivation for sex(duplication) and for awe(unpredictable?) Still the the idea that it is a “competition” between those two drives doesn’t seem that efficient. However, it feels like what they guy from personality junkie said about NPs is sound in that a lot of the ideas I come across seem almost by accident like it is the universal impulse.

Now, I could just try to focus on reading the text books and doing the homework for the possible ideas I will stumble on and the connections I happen to make. I am working to motivate myself from within an educational system that is not built specifically for me so I have to figure out how to work it. Or maybe the system is fine, and it’s just like jogging where I have to get used to it.

The other possibility is that the universe is made up of not randomness but a system. This makes sense in that the big bang would be a cause, and the rest would be the effect. So if we rewound this to the start and initiated the same bang, we would get the same result. So it isn’t random is it?

It makes more sense that the human then is a system with an urge for duplication
among other elements of it’s system.

My question was, does it make sense for me to have a specific goal, or is it
better to just focus on learning more. Goals are what brought me here in the
first place. Maybe “here” is the goal.

I’ve thought about this before actually. It’s good to have goals that come
to you, but trying to seek out goals to have seems like not the best idea.
It seems unessesary.

Also, why do I get so much more motivation in class where as at home I don’t
just sit around reading the text book. Well, it could be that exchanging ideas
with other people, exressing my ideas, IS a goal for me. If this were the case
it would be good as the more the ideas flow the more can be done for society.
Also my motivation for studying outside of class would be to be ahead so I can
keep up with the conversation and say my peice.

I guess also I could go online and start a blog and try to get other people to
read it etc but that might be too much work for too little reward. Iunno.
It would be a fun side project though, at least in the fun classes. Also yes,
some classes are more fun and rewarding than others. That is part of my problem
right now. I’m talking a lot of classes that just don’t engage me enough,
and don’t generate enough ideas. There is no sense trying to argue that these
classes are actually good for me and that I need to adapt somehow. They are just
not efficient uses of my time.

Or, maybe it depends how I look at the classes. I mean, given the choice I might
not want to have to take states/research/ling, but I migh be able to make them
fun if I:
1. Look at the concepts from different angles, like trying to get deeper into them and
2. Bring out questions based on 1. in class.

So the motivation for doing them is still because have to do them instead of something
more intriguing. However, I can get a lot of fun out of it by doing steps 1. and 2.

If I only did step 1. I would have less motivation to read ahead because I wouldn’t
have a way of contributig based on that extra work.
If I only did 2. well in many cases that is what I have now. I mostly just do 2. and
it works out ok but not great.

I feel like there are a lot of external motivations that could come into play
in education. However I feel that a motivation that will be lasting and enjoyable
it needs to come from within.

So, just like lifting heavy things and running fast because it feels good, I would
rather focus on learning for the sake of learning. I feel like sometimes I become out
of touch with the enjoyment of learning for that sake. However, this could easily
be more about metabolic factors than anything else. When I discover/create a new idea
that is truely awesome, it is empowering and rewarding. The only time it’s…
THE ONLY TIME IT’S NOT, IS WHEN I AM FOCUSING SQUARILY ON WHAT I DON’T HAVE!
(not that I should never focus on what I don’t have, I am not sure, maybe, but
not sure) It seems like learning about sexuality has helped with my understanding of
the world. Although a lot of the big stuff like mbti was learned more for the sake of
finding intrinsic motivation and just plain fun.

When I’m not focused on what I don’t have btw, then there is no underlying goal for my
learning. I just learn because I want to know. Knowing, experiencing, is living.

It’s intrinsic. When people learn to focus in on the intrinsics, there will be
no more “work”. For instance, I’m going to work today not for the money. 34$ or something
for 4 hours of physical labor. I mean yeah it adds up, but I am more there for the
relationships and the physical activity.

People were getting slaves to do their work for them, because they couldn’t see that
the work was actually good for them.

So in order to get to this state where you are only focused on the intrinsic rewards,
I think it has a lot to do with dopamine. It’s like when you let go of all the things
that might be fun to have the dopamine receptors increase. Like, if you were to just
let yourself be bored. Then you would start day dreaming and being creative. I feel like
the getting creative part is what happens when the receptors finally start up regulating.

So if you could upregulate them earlier, through exercise etc, then you would find it
easier to let go of other shit, the extrinsic stuff, and just get motivated.

I feel like this is a big thing. I feel like here the ability of a human to self-acualize
could be improved by things like increase dopamine receptors. So in this sense, it seems
what people need is to be healthy mentally. I mean, understanding the concepts of abundance
and self reliance are important too, but when it comes to actually enjoyin the intrinsic
rewards, dopamine is the reward, so you need to be able to produce and utilize it or you
will just be a couch potatoe monk.

You could see dopamine receptors and that kind of thing as an internal awareness of

what we need to be doing with our time. If we don’t keep it healthy, we start to lose touch

with that internal compass thing. Not that we don’t need to be rational if we have it,

just that it is a drive.

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Sexuality and Motivation

I feel like getting older, having more responsibilities, puts a dampener on what would otherwise by  very rampant sex drive. As I increase my sexual energy through a variety of means, as well as my level of optimism and confidence, I become aware that my ability to explore sexuality is dependent on my ability to handle my responsibilities.

If I want to be available when a willing partner is in the mood, for example, I need to have done all my homework and studying for tests ahead of time. So I am now losing interesting in procrastination. Also because of the idea that my sex drive might be lowered just by knowing there are things I have to do.

So one kind of life goal I guess wuld be to not have anything that “needs” doing anymore, or just to always be well ahead of dead lines. Also this makes me want to work, like get a better job etc so I can have that sense of freedom. This same thing happened last year around this time when I started jogging and working out and I think edging as well. So what should I do about it? I definitely want to stay in school. It feels like where I belong in a big way.

I believe this was my motivation for going to college the first time actually, or at least to study for personal trainining! I was doing the 7 day cycle and I think edging, and I just started focusing more and more on what I needed to do to have the sex life I wanted. I realize though that my ideas of ideal sex life were kind of naivee. Also the way I lost that steam I had going into college, I think had a bit to do with my change of sex habits to nofap hardmode, and less jogging etc. Anyways I hope now to come at this from a more refined angle/perspective.Based on the shit I am good at and where I will feel more at home.

On the bus my thoughts were: Maybe I could benifit by getting inolved in computer science.
Maybe also an important factor is that I’m cool with not doing everything all on my own also it would be a pretty good way of indirectly helping people believe more in themselves if I try to have us tackle a big goal..
I think I need to focus on what ideas I could contribute since this seems to a major strength along with my understanding of people.

I feel like getting older, having more responsibilities, puts a dampener on what would otherwise by  very rampant sex drive. As I increase my sexual energy through a variety of means, as well as my level of optimism and confidence, I become aware that my ability to explore sexuality is dependent on my ability to handle my responsibilities.

If I want to be available when a willing partner is in the mood, for example, I need to have done all my homework and studying for tests ahead of time. So I am now losing interesting in procrastination. Also because of the idea that my sex drive might be lowered just by knowing there are things I have to do.

So one kind of life goal I guess wuld be to not have anything that “needs” doing anymore, or just to always be well ahead of dead lines. Also this makes me want to work, like get a better job etc so I can have that sense of freedom. This same thing happened last year around this time when I started jogging and working out and I think edging as well. So what should I do about it? I definitely want to stay in school. It feels like where I belong in a big way.

I believe this was my motivation for going to college the first time actually, or at least to study for personal trainining! I was doing the 7 day cycle and I think edging, and I just started focusing more and more on what I needed to do to have the sex life I wanted. I realize though that my ideas of ideal sex life were kind of naivee. Also the way I lost that steam I had going into college, I think had a bit to do with my change of sex habits to nofap hardmode, and less jogging etc. Anyways I hope now to come at this from a more refined angle/perspective.Based on the shit I am good at and where I will feel more at home.

On the bus my thoughts were: Maybe I could benifit by getting inolved in computer science.
Maybe also an important factor is that I’m cool with not doing everything all on my own also it would be a pretty good way of indirectly helping people believe more in themselves if I try to have us tackle a big goal..
I think I need to focus on what ideas I could contribute since this seems to a major strength along with my understanding of people.

Ok, so my thoughts now are:

I feel like getting older, having more responsibilities, puts a dampener on what would otherwise by  very rampant sex drive. As I increase my sexual energy through a variety of means, as well as my level of optimism and confidence, I become aware that my ability to explore sexuality is dependent on my ability to handle my responsibilities.

If I want to be available when a willing partner is in the mood, for example, I need to have done all my homework and studying for tests ahead of time. So I am now losing interesting in procrastination. Also because of the idea that my sex drive might be lowered just by knowing there are things I have to do.

So one kind of life goal I guess wuld be to not have anything that “needs” doing anymore, or just to always be well ahead of dead lines. Also this makes me want to work, like get a better job etc so I can have that sense of freedom. This same thing happened last year around this time when I started jogging and working out and I think edging as well. So what should I do about it? I definitely want to stay in school. It feels like where I belong in a big way.

I believe this was my motivation for going to college the first time actually, or at least to study for personal trainining! I was doing the 7 day cycle and I think edging, and I just started focusing more and more on what I needed to do to have the sex life I wanted. I realize though that my ideas of ideal sex life were kind of naivee. Also the way I lost that steam I had going into college, I think had a bit to do with my change of sex habits to nofap hardmode, and less jogging etc. Anyways I hope now to come at this from a more refined angle/perspective.Based on the shit I am good at and where I will feel more at home.

On the bus my thoughts were: Maybe I could benifit by getting inolved in computer science.
Maybe also an important factor is that I’m cool with not doing everything all on my own also it would be a pretty good way of indirectly helping people believe more in themselves if I try to have us tackle a big goal..
I think I need to focus on what ideas I could contribute since this seems to a major strength along with my understanding of people.
Maybe I should focus on ideas that other people can implement.

Ok, so my thoughts now are:

I’ve already tried starting my own business and I don’t enjoy it. I don’t enjoy the isolation.
Also I don’t really have a business or money making idea. I mean sure I can think of some, just that none are very efficient, or if they are they require a huge amount of work upfront.
Also even just thinking about money right now, it totally psyches my out of studying and I have a test tmr.
One thing I haven’t really tried, and that seems most authentic, would be to just put everything into school.
What could that get me though? I need more than just good grades.
Hmmm, well I know there are opportunities to work while in school, but is that even the best use of my time? Especially when I have a part time job already with 2 years in and formed some great relationships.
I have ideas, but they are focused on living the life I want, not on money. My ideas are what has resulted in so many awesome discoveries.
I know what I can do. I can put everything into school. I can give it 110% and hope that in doing so I become exceptional to the point that I am respected by teachers as well as peers. To the point where jobs are guaranteed and, taking out a loan will not be an issue, and maybe I’ll even find ways into a business thing with the school or something crazy like that.
There wont be a quick way to supporting myself and school full time. At least not one that will allow me to work at my highest potential.
What focusing all this sexual energy on school will do is it will be the union of that sexual instinct to provide or whatever, and my natural intellectual inclinations. This seems like by far the best use of that energy I can think of right now.

The Fertile Male Part 2: The Contrast between Fertile sexuality and Porn Sexuality

These are the differences between being really horny after a week of no porn & no masturbation:

Fertile Sexuality: Enjoying the feeling of being horny
Porn Sexuality: Searching for something better, disappointment, wishing you could get that type in real life

Fertile Sexuality: Women are partners to share your sexuality with.
Porn Sexuality: Women become objects to to aquired/won/etc.

Fertile Sexuality: IRL more open about who you find attractive with other
men or people in general.
Porn Sexuality: Threatened by other men IRL, by their sexuality,
by girls who might chose them instead, or just competition.

Fertile Sexuality: Abundance of sperm therefore more confident in self
Porn Sexuality:  It’s like, you have minimal sperm therefore you must
make it count? Iunno, or like you are not valuable?

Fertile Sexuality: You get into that sexual state and you notice the innate
sexuality of other women and you see sex as something good. You see it
as mutually beneficial.

Porn Sexuality: You see women as fragile and something you need to be
committed to. You see sex as something you are taking from them and
have little to offer in return. It is a big responsibility and a risk
of everything from embarrassment to iunno, psychological damage
to her and or yourself.

Note, these are based on how I feel and I am a pretty sensitive person and
keep the well being of others in mind. someone less sensitive, less empathetic,
less focused on the well being of others maybe just accept the porn
sexuality and still have sex but it just be a damaging version of sexuality.

So here are more ideas for becoming more in-tune with ones own sexuality:

Make sure to state that sexual pleasure but focused on yourself as a sexual being, not fantasizing, is important. Fantasizing or watching porn(the worse version of this) directs energy towards something that is not returning that energy to you. Also it’s a totally different method of pleasure, visual stimuli versus feeling sexual energy.

Visual on it’s own, without a real person behind it, is more of a drain. It’s looking at something with longing but not really having it. Feeling your own sexual energy, means not being in that state of NEED, but instead filling up from the inside. Just like with other forms of happiness, you can find shit you like, or just shit other people would like you to like.

Filling up on your own energy allows you to have and feel like you have, something to offer sexually, which you do as you become more fertile. You worship your own fertility and then you attract someone who compliments you. Naturally people with more rational mindsets or lower sex drives or sensitive dopamine systems etc not sure which, may gravitate towards holding in orgasms to prolonge pressure. This is a natural use of delayed gratification. I think possibly more natural that ejaculating at least for me, as I only masterbated to orgasm after reading it was possible from a book. lol.

Anyways, higher sex drive males may just jerk off more, and with less prolonging, so I guess that is how things even out as far as attraction goes. When you allow yourself to feel the sexual pleasure and energy that is yours you being more connected to you sexuality. It’s just like with inspiration based activities versus doing it for some external gain or just because you love it.
So sex based on the way someone else looks is like working for money where as sex based on how it feels, the raw sexual energy, is working out of inspiration.

I mean sure if the money and the gratitude of others comes then that’s even better. However, if you are ONLY doing it for that reason, then it’s not the same. Same with sex. If you get that attractive girl and she has amazing orgasms then that is icing on the cake, but you should appreciate your sexual energy even without that other stuff. Sexual energy is a gift. It’s opportunity, and abundance. So it is worth cultivating for it’s own sake because, well because it feels good.

Also, to say you are not horny all the time and so have a low sex drive and that’s just who you are is maybe to a full argument. I kind of feel like, if you wish you had a higher sex drive, and enjoy it when you do, then you have a high sex drive, and should find ways to bring the energy up to what you would rather it be.

That’s kind of like my argument for using maca or anything else for the purpose of increases sex drive.
Here is another argument as well though. The fact that usually like for something like maca, the sex drive comes with a general feeling of well being. So if someone where to say, “if you aren’t horny don’t force it or you aren’t being authentic” well I would say, being horny if it’s just a part of well-being, should be forced lol.

I feel like authentic is whatever is done out of love and is not subject to biological innateness. What I mean is, just because you were born feeling a certain way doesn’t mean you should accept and remain feeling that way in the face of ways of feeling
that you would rather have.

If I use maca I will just consider myself ahead of the curve.
Why bother sticking to what is natural, in fear that you will lose
the sense of who you really are. Why no focus on trying to be a better
version of yourself no matter how you have to do that.

I guess there is also that feeling of impermanence, but what does that
matter. the knowledge of the thing that can improve you, and the decision
to keep using it, these things are permanent.

The Fertile Male Part 1: Correlation between sperm production and attractiveness

There is a big diff between the nofap protocol and just iunno, being high l-tyrosine

For one, nofap is almost sleep/diet and workout independent.
It’s like it taps into this innate drive. Also and a very important point is the level of attractiveness you have to others. Nofap increases this while high tyrosine maybe does nothing.

It seems nofap is about relief.

Relief from the incessant urge, via ignoring it
relief from the 2am surfing
relief from checking out people who are not interested

however, it is relief and a positive thing, only for as long
as the urge exists. Once it doesn’t, the lack of urge becomes
the thing we want relief from.

Hence the 6-7 day cycle which as well brings relief from the
urge on the last day as well as relief from the impending loss
of drive.

Ah I just thought of something. Here is where I start to make my point.

I was wondering, why such a big deal with the
getting horny and more attractive but only until
7 days and then it going away? why would biology do
that?

Well I thought, what other areas of human physiology work
this way? One is cardiovascular activity, or just general
moderate-intense exercise. After 45 min it becomes counter
productive.

So the same could be for somethngn like celibacy.
Why?
Well because semen would be produced up to a point (7 days)
making pregnancy more likely (attractiveness and horny)
but after that time it would become less likely after
a wet dream or semen died or full balls, etc.

It seems like the optimal reproductive strategy would be that
fertile males have sex with fertile females.
Monogomy which could easily be just one of the many symtoms of
“lockian or rousseuan society” could be to the detriment of
optimal reproduction.

Now I’m going to go off on a little tangent but don’t worry this isn’t my main point.

That is to say, if a women can only have sex with one man while
in her fertile period, it would decrease the probability of her
giving birth.

for example. A society of 30 men and 30 women, would see one or two
females ovulating per day but 4 or 5 men having gone without ejaculation
for 7 days. So optimal reproduction would mean each fertile women get’s
to be with around 2 men. 2 and a half men lol. one for each night of
ovulation, to give her the largest amount of semen they can.

Back to the main point.
So it would stand to reason that what a women is attracted to in a
man on nofap is THEIR fertility. Just has what a man is attracted to
in a women when she is ovulating is HERS.

SO it would stand to reason that we could create a practice to cultivate
maximum sperm production, just as we cultivate muscle mass, etc.

I wonder what else we can cultivate.

So it should be easy to see why a girl might be less into a guy who
approaches her for sex, but on a day when he is “empty”. I mean
obviously a guy can still be attractive and sex happens for reasons other
than procreation. However what if it’s that for ONS the vibe would be
more of a procreation vibe where as for a longer term thing the vibe
would be sex because you actually like the person.

Now a thought i was thinking that has nothing to do with sex.
Also the test I did for special ed that had me memorize disjointed
items and try to regurgitate them, I would say is not a true
test of learning ability. I mean, it is one form of learning.
However, to say not being as strong in it could be seen as an obstacle
is probably not a very good way to do it. Especially since most higher
level learning is based on systems thinking, the exact opposite of memorizing
disjointed facts.

Anyways, so it would be interesting to research ways to increase fertility
in males. I know testosterone is one way, but I feel like that is just one
factor and maybe not even a factor as apparently testosterone increases after
ejaculation. Well this COULD be as a way of starting up semen production
again. However, starting it up is not what is attractive to females. What
is attractive is having a lot of it and the signal that body language
and attitude convey when that is the case.

So I wonder if anything could increase semen volume without relying on
max testosterone, because you can only do so much where testosterone is
concerned. Unless I start taking supplements for testosterone, which I could
do actually but I feel like would be too much too soon.

I was going to save this for another post but I think it fits in better here so
here are some way’s I’ve thought of to increase sperm production based
on research etc:

Besides supplements for increasing testosterone which are many such as Maca, ashwanganda, etc,
Light therapy (get a lamp that gives 10000 lux light and sit infront of it. Or get lot’s of
sun light. These both help the body prudice FSH and LH which help produce testosterone
and sperm I think.

Next, “edging”, that is, getting yourself worked up through masterbation bu
not orgasming. This is so obvious because what happens when you do this too much? You
get blue balls which is basically balls too full with sperm. However, I notice I haven’t been
getting this lately, i only really got it hen making out with a girlfriend many years ago. However,
during that time I was horny everyday and was doing nofap, before nofap was even a thing.

Now, I’ll stop things here because this idea of edging leads to my next post which will
be on the contrat between the sexual state and the non-sexual state from a very philosophicaland I guess holistic perspective.

Stoicism, Perspective, Sex, success, “giving up”

So yesterday I was feeling tired and so I decided I would just stop trying to think or keep myself awake etc. I was sitting on the bus and so I guess I got some micro-sleeps because I felt better soon after and was actually horny and for the rest of the evening a lot of women looked really attractive to me. However, then I started researching stuff about increasing or maintaining this feeling using herbs etc, and then I was up until past 12.

I originally decided to take a nap out of a sense of being overwhelmed slightly, and realizing I was doing it to myself. Why was I doing it to myself though? Well, because of other people and other perspectives out of which grew
a kind of damaging idea. The idea is that if you want to be happy you need to push yourself beyond what is healthy to earn it. That you are not good enough that you should be happy and that the only way to get there is to become something more.
“More” which is really a target moving further and further in to the distance forever.

Then there is the other way. Instead of striving for happiness, just strive for relief from unhappiness, in the healthiest and most
effective ways you can. Heh, then as I got up to start walking I starting thinking hmm maybe it’s about denying yourself things, like, not indulging. Based on how much peanuts suck for my mood. Then as I starting walking I though, wait, i don’t want to have to deny myself happiness. Then walking more I thought what is it I keep doing that keeps me in this cycle of happiness and then unhappiness. Also I thought about perspectives.

Then I thought, I’m really tied right now and no sex drive and it feels shitty, but what if I had just had a huge orgy last night and THEN woke up feeling this way? Maybe it would feel like a success so I would feel satisfied. So maybe I just need to change my perspective from one of constantly seeking sucess to one of seeing myself as already and always successful. In the short term people might not understand this way of seeing things, but I guess as long as it ended up as me being inspired and
doing more, then maybe it would work out. Sitting down again I feel like, would I feel that ONE orgy was success if it could never happen again? hmmm

So I think this is very important, especially in times when you already are kind of happy but thinking about being more happy. Here it seems I have the choice. I can either just chill and be happy with what I have and who I am, or I can stay up later than I should trying to get somewhere better. Iunno, because it’s hard once you are in a shitty mood to just have the perspective of being awesome. Or at least, even if you can feel like a success, it wont stop you from being in a bad mood. I guess it could at least stop you from letting your mood get any worse. So it could be that the best time to make the change in perspective, is while in a shitty mood lol.

So I guess a very stoic way of looking at the world then, which would be independent of social judgements so free of interference by other peoples perspectives, would just be that achievements don’t matter. Money doesn’t matter, travel doesn’t matter, sex doesn’t matter, health maybe doesn’t even matter. All that matters if even that, is consiousness. It matters as much
as it IS. You can’t have perspective without being conscious therefore consciousness “matters”. now that is a sleek design.

All these other things, even happiness, are all kind of transient as experiences in that you could expereince being happy one moment and then not happy the next. Consiousness isn’t quite like that. For the most part you are conscious or you are not. Well I guess there are levels of “clear hotheadedness” or fuzziness so I guess even there it’s hard to say.

Also if teal swan is right that you can’t stop wanting something you want, namely happiness, then the perspective of not care, wouldn’t be in conflict with this, it would just make it easier to get it.

Christianity and other religious views of an afterlife are also different perspectives that probably had an impact on me when I was younger. The idea of having unlimited lifespan is appealing.

Also, well, there is a difference between changing perspective of success and changing perspectives on relationships and general health. I am all for letting go of the idea of “success” I think success is realizing success is a fad and then having only the goals you just want to do and that would be painful to not do.

Health I hear from teal is perspective based as well, like you could be wounded but just change the perspective so that you don’t care. I guess maybe this has a place, if it adds to happiness.

The relationships, I think this is tricky. I don’t want to become sociopath. For now I think my biggest issue is just success so I think if I could let go of that idea I would be happier and sleep better etc. Basically realize if you die without achieving all your goals it isn’t really…iunno. It feels weird to say this, almost like it’s welcoming death lol. Well I can say at least for goals involving expressing myself, it’s kind of like how a child will want attention, the more growing should lead to less caring about it until you don’t care if anyone praises you for anything.

It’s almost like that Fe(people focused part of me) was trying to please other people, I guess through Si(body focused part, but if I let go of that perspective, iunno, maybe it will free me to actually just love people. It seems that this is what happens. It seems like today a lot of what people hate each other and fight over are just permutations of need of love from each other. Based on a perspective that it actually matters that people love you.

Doing what interests me: The study of People?

I started thinking, I need to stop focusing on just meeting people. It just doesn’t feel like a fulfilling idea on it’s own and it seemed that whenever I would be meeting people just for the sake of it, out of desperation, it wouldn’t work out. At least with the last person I met just in public, I was more focused on the curiosity, what could happen, who is she. Not on some need. At least I think that’s what it was although yes the habit of approaching was learned because I felt I needed to meet someone. I that one situation I had started jogging and taking vitamin d and sleeping well so iunno I’d like to say it wasn’t because of desperation that I met her, I’d like to say meeting her is inline with the idea I’m coming to.

The idea I have now is that ok so I need something meaningful to do, I can’t just be meeting people, trying to have sex, ect, it’s just not fun. So what is worth doing. What is meaningful is what I give to improve this world. What I can give from a place of abundance where it just happens almost effortlessly. What happens out of love. For me that is as I said in last mega post, that I organically come to discover ideas as I do things I’m interested in in the short term. Either conclusions that help me solve some problem I want to solve with some immediacy or just something cool  discover. Then I share that with others as a way of simply spotting and removing the piece of glass from the floor because I noticed it first.

So yeah I have problems or, well not really, I mean just deciding what to do is a problem you could say, but It’s more of a necessary hobby lol. Then how to gain muscle ect, problems but more of hobbies. Then stuff like the heel spur I have, problems but whatever I’ll fix it. What I’m looking for is not really a problem to solve, why would I look for problems just so I can be productive. That’s no fun and not even that productive. So What I’ll do is look for things I can discover. Discovery is fun. It’s what i enjoy doing. It’s organic, short term gain with no commitments. So what is interesting for me. Not movies or video games or anime anymore, they all seem the same now. People though, that is different. Well I know I just said I don’t want to focus on meeting people, but that was meeting people for the sake of company and support. Now I am talking about meeting/seeing/reading about people for the sake of discovery, learning, evolution.

Now I’ll just mention, I can study people in other ways like I can listen to new music as a way of studying the composer. New art as a way of discovering the mind of an artist. Ect. I might get to that actually but right now…

So I realized, why not check back to youtube and the MBTI channels. Find some I like. Then I found this INTJ and thought, well INTJ’s cognitively go well with ENTPs so let’s hear what she has to say. Which lead me to her blog which I’m glad I found!

Coincidentally I am using this blog titled knowyourselffree which was a name I came up with I think back in 2009. Since I have thought of many other things worth doing beyond knowing myself but somehow it always seems to come back to it. Not as a direction in itself but as an important tool in doing what I want to do. It’s coincidental because knowing ones self is what her blog Ihttp://psychologicalmilkshake.blogspot.ca or at least the post I read is about.

Got some Bleach soundtrack music in the background so I’m taking in new information that way as well, and I feel like maybe I’m getting on track. Also I’ll not that learn about people doesn’t have to be studying people as objects. At least I hope not. I think the key here is for both people to be on the same page as far as wanting to learn about one another, otherwise the studier is always objectifying the studied.

The study of Sexuality as a Health/Philosophical Algorithm

Sex is a big part of human life. For one, without it life would not have persisted until this point. I find sex and sexuality to be simply amazing. On all levels, intellectual, emotional, physical, ect. The drive to attract a female and share a sexual experience with her has led me to a huge number of insights. I guess to some people the resources and environment make having sex easy but for me it has been very long to even get started. However I am so glad I took the long road, reading about seduction, reading about how to adjust my neuro-chemistry to make socializing with females come easier, and all the new philosophies I generated to make sense of and connect many separate concepts.

For example:

if I think about what type of male would be most attractive to a female, in general of course(general meaning average meaning allowing for larger number of options meaning more sex) I find I automatically think of traits that are best for the individual male to have anyways. There is no difference really between the most attractive man (to a woman) and the most healthy man in general. Not to say there is only one type of man that is most attractive and definitely not to say that type would fit any stereotypical man from the movies. Every man is different, but each can develop in a most sexually attractive way and this way will lead also to better over all health mentally, physically, emotionally, and otherwise.

Not to say that all a man should strive to be is attractive to females, because authenticity, a man being true to what he wants + what is best for him, is more attractive often than what a woman thought she would want. It’s just that being sexually attractive is a good indication that a person is doing something right (at least within a healthy environment, because in an unhealthy environment, an unhealthy person may seem attractive but this is mostly a transient state because unhealthy is not sexy.)

Conclusion to this very rough first post:

Reproduction is how new life begins in our species so I guess it makes sense that the study of human sexuality would lead to so much knowledge that is so transferable to other areas of life. I am starting to think that the study of human sexuality should at least be given far more attention that it is being given right now by educational institutions.

 

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