Aesthetic Appreciation and Sex Drive

First I’m gonna through some links at ya…:

This is where some guys describe how they are more sensitive to music after ejaculation: http://www.quora.com/Why-do-I-become-very-sensitive-to-music-right-after-I-ejaculate

This is an article about how artists have more sexual partners and that the number of partners is positively correlated to how seriously they pursue their artistic direction:http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/does-creativity-depend-on-raging-hormones-520787.html

Here is another about musical appreciation after ejaculation: https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20140327134618AAFBkwt

Now, what I want to discuss may not be so clear from these links because it is related to something I’ve realized while doing this NoFap thing. It is that when I am masturbating normally, I am more musical, or so it seems. I started creating music again with a vengeance after I started masturbating again after a 2 year celibacy/nofap period. During the no fap period I don’t recall creating any music. As well, now that I have started another round of nofap I find myself becoming less interested in making music…but that could just be coincidental and it’s probably too soon to say.

However, what I think could be said, is that while on nofap I become more fashion conscious. Beyond that I feel I become more aware of visual aesthetics in general, at lease when it comes to women, but I think just generally.

Let me throw this philosophical link at ya, which talks about nietzshe describes a subconscious will made up of sex drive and artistic desire which he believes has the power to transform a person, society, world,etc: http://artintelligence.net/review/?p=824

I wonder about this. How important aesthetics are. I know I value beauty highly. The thing is, there seems to be this attitude among lot’s of people that beauty is just a luxury. However, I believe it is far more than that. Not just because of passion, or psychosomatic effects, but for abstract, algorithmic secrets that beauty holds which even if we only sense in what seems to be a primitive appreciation, is actually a path we can follow to new ways of being.

Now for some reflection:

For a long time I have thought, if I’m going to dress really cool, like a video game character level of cool, then shouldn’t I also be doing video game level stuff, like action packed saving the world type stuff? Otherwise it’s like all bark and no bite. Flashy but ineffective. Etc.

Now though what I realize is that to create beauty, you have to have power already, which everyone does, it’s personal power we all have. We have power, to express our beauty. So Beauty implies power. However, power does not imply beauty, at least in the terms people think of power to be, such as nuclear arms, money, etc. Although if we later realize that beauty is the true source of happiness, even in some abstract way, then we can maybe say the nuclear arms and money are actually not power at all if they are used by someone who doesn’t want to create and express beauty, because they are dis-empowered in not wanting to do so.

Anyways, what I think now, is that we need to be our own type of hero, not the type people make action films about, unless that need actually arises in your life. The type of hero I feel is needed in mine is the type that is authentic in their appreciation of beauty, and works to build that through their lifestyle, and grow in powers of expressing that into their world to the benefit of them and everyone else who can appreciate it.

Sex Drive: Dopamine Receptors

So I’ll list the things I did today, the things I that I think contributed,
then I’ll list the possible confounding variables,
then I’ll give what I’ve concluded.

What I did:

Control Breakfast of french toast. Wheat could have been a factor
in low sex drive but I eat it anyways so as not to test to many variables
at once, not to mention I’ve had a high sexdrive with french toast before.

Oh, I also started with a cup of skim milk, last bit I had left.
I’m assuming the effects of tyrosine wouldn’t persiste beyond a few hours
so I’m assuming the result wasn’t caused by this, although I could be
wrong.

Felt a sugar high from the milk.

Went to gym, tried to bench but wasn’t feeling it, the sugar high
was wearing off and leaving me feeling uncoordinated. So instead I
hoped on the treadmill for 28? minutes.

Left feeling refreshed.

Went to the right class but an hour early. Stood in the isle lookin for a
seat and a girl point for me to sit in some seats behind me. 3rd time since working
on my serotonin that I was basically given a place to sit. Second time was wednesday
where a girl tapped me on the shoulder to sit beside her in empty seat. I think
it’s cause I’m so confident as to stand around scanning the seats for a while, that
it is attractive and girls use it as an invitation. The girl today looked back at
me. Anyways as I said I quickly realized I was in the wrong class.

I stretched and did Hanzi.

no lunch.

Went to class.

Drank lot’s of water.

After class, went home. I was going to by food but I actually felt
a bit of a horniness feeling and wanted to see how far it would get
if I didn’t eat. On the bus I felt a bit of sex drive and arousal when
an attractive lady was seated infront of me.

Had my second meal at 2:30pm, first one was at 8:15am?
so 6.5 hours apart.

It was wild rice (wheat) and salmon rose fryed in olive oil.

At around 3:00pm as I lay on bed surfing on lap top I felt more
sex drive and arousal than before.

What I think contributed:

my hypothesis for today was that it could be my dopamin receptors being
low, instead of the need for more dopamine or testosterone.

So Jogging would help cause it increases both dop and receptors
Then The long wait between meals with no snack in between would
have increased them more. Then a meal with salmon for
tyrosin but that was not very large, and stopping all eating after
words, would do the rest.

Also last night wasn’t the best for sleep, although I had a crzy dream.
Also, no zinc last night, I’ve run out. Obviously from the whole week
of low sex drive, I’ve decided zinc is not a main factor,
at least not in sex drive, although maybe in muscle recovery ect.

So cardio, and meal restriction

What could make my results meaningless:
The glass of skim milk, if the idea is the tyrosine was
building up over the last few days and today’s glass
was just enough to perk up my sex drive.

—–

Placebo.

lactic acid from joggin increased testosterone somehow more than weight
training had been.

I had been eating turkey sausages and bananas for the last 2 weeks,
which I guess concluded yesterday?

My conclusion:

Well I’m not really concluding anything here. What I’m deciding is
to continue working with the dopamine receptors and remove the variables
that are causing a problem.

Milk is done
—-
For now I’ll refrain from turkey and bananas and
instead just do enough cardio and hope my mood remains confident.

I’ll continue on a 3 meal a day with the meals spaced 8:30am, 2:30pm, 8:30pm,
sticking to foods that don’t leave me feeling overly indulged as peanuts do.
I’ll try to walk often and jog when possible, sleep well, weights.

More notes:

After eating lunch, in teh first 30min after I started feeling arousal,
however by 4pm I was just really tired, almost depressed. I had an impulse
to eat something thinking maybe that’s what I needed to feel better, but I
ignored it cause I realize that impulse is part of the problem, and the wheat
probably the other part.

I feel refreshed so it seems that just like with breakfast sometimes,
after I eat lunch I’ll have a 2hr period of feeling like shit. Well, also it was
the “seista” time, so it’s naturally a low energy period. I think though that
meal content and activity level around the time plays a big role too. I always feel
tired after eating that wild rice. Definitly not as bad as if it was white bread,
however, white/basmati rice might have been better. Also I drank a lot of water
right before going to the bathroom. Makes sense that the rice would be dehydrating.
heh, and I would have just ate more food.

Also, I feel like beyond all the things I will refrain from now that I see
how important it is to stop seeking these forms of positive emotion
from outside, I’m probably going to need something to do to. Not a distraction,
but a passion.

oh yeah, and increasin d receptors increases d apparently?
And increased d decreases prolactin which let’s t increase,
which would kind of immunize me against wet dream losses of sex drive.

Also, and this is something extremely important. When I was a kid, I had lot’s
of energy and extrovertion, and sex drive even. I could never figure out where all that
went. I realize now that as a child, well for one thing I had wasn’t always in a good
mood, especially when I was really hungry or thirsty or had too much sugar.
However, the secret I just discovered, was exactly that. Well not the sugar, but the fact
that I was hungry often. Like, I only got three meals a day. At least until friends would
bring snacks some times and I’d have some. I would have breakfast, lunch,
oh and a snack at day care, and then dinner. For me though, my meals were often not always
enough, also weekends and summer I think it was just the three meals.

Also I feel kind of like my memory is better now. Iunno, are my thoughts clearer?
Or am I just on a thread that automatically allows me to jog my memory. “Diet
through time”. Iunno, I expect my memory and thinking to get better as I do this
in conjuction with cardio.

Three meals, no snacks, no super fatty food.

%d bloggers like this: