ENTPs Optimism and the Afterlife

I am wondering what the deal is with ENTP among rational types when it comes to religion. Maybe there is no strong correlation, but I have a feeling there is. I have a feeling that AT LEAST it is that we are less likely to be decisive about what we believe. More likely to be agnostic.

Anyways my main topic is how an ENTPs views of religion may change when they are under stress. I have really just myself as the anecdotal evidence of the idea I’m going to try and prove. The idea is that ENTPs being possible one of the most optimistic types when we are in a good mood, would ideally at least not be atheist. We would at least be closer to hoping there is something out there, than to thinking when we die nothing happens.

My situation as far as I can remember is that when I was at my highest so far, back in high -school, I was also at my most religious or most contemplating of religion. Or at least I was most optimistic about what happens after we die. I was pretty much 100% that we would go somewhere even cooler that where I was.

However I need to mention that religion can be a double edge sword depending on which one you chose. Christiantiy is a religion with as much negative ideas as positive as far as I recall (have not read the bible front to back or even close) There is heaven, and there is also hell, let’s leave it at that. SO when I became stressed, it wasn’t automatically that I would not believe in an after life. Instead I would think well maybe I wont end up in heaven, or maybe I will be punished, etc. Not to say the religion is the cause of my stress, just that as a framework it as elements that lend themselves well to being tied up in any anxiety I may already have.

Next, at what might have been my most stressed out I had kind of an existential crisis which lead to the Descartian skepticism which isn’t delusional at all, just not optimistic. This remained until now (years later) and I will probably always have it as one perspective of many. However, I feel that as I exercise more and  become more optimistic it is likely that at least my dominant views of the afterlife will become more hopeful and less skeptical.

Words I wrote with mindfulness (from art of war)


ENTP-SI and order and aesthetics and rhythm

Si – Organization

I feel like Si, at least for me, is possibly the missing link then
in making who I am come together.

I remember reading the guy on personalityjunkie saying that an ENTP
would do best to focus on the first two functions as far as careers

I guess I agree with that but I think an entp should focus on Si as
much as need just for the sake of personal development which in turn
will lead to getting the career that uses the Ne-Ti and is fun or whatever.

For a very easy and introductory point on the importance of Si, if you
don’t exercise it’s probably that you will feel like shit eventually, which
is Si telling you to exercise. Then you exercise and feel better and
your magnetic personality shines through and you get jobs etc.

More than this, you have so many ideas, but they are not organized in a way
that allows you to present them to anyone else or even look back at any
specific thought you had. In order to do this you need to ORGANIZE them
probably on paper or a blog/journal.

After doing this, and to the degree that you do this, you will be better
understood by the people around you and so more likely to get work.
All because you organized your OWN life to make yourself feel better.

You can think of exercise as physical organization. It sets your biological
clock so you get tired at the right time. It Stokes your metabolism and
reward chemicals. It is biological maintenance.

You can think of meditation as neurological maintenance. You focus on your
breath, or on counting, and your brain organizes itself and grows to become
structured in a more efficient way.

You can think of cleaning your room as spacial or personal facility
organization. You organize your stuff so you know where it is, so your
brain has this same structured image of your stuff. You do the same
for you journal. Your brain will have a spacially structured image
of your life. You can surroung yourself strategically with only posters
that compel you to think about certain aspects of life, as environment
will trigger thoughts and ideas which we thrive on.


As well, I guess you could say order is a form, or maybe even the
highest form, of aesthetics.

Random notes

Si as rhythm, event based, time based, like history, based on duplication,
like the universe. Based on order.

Is there a rhythm in things like writing chinese characters for instance, that
can make the process of writing them more enjoyable?

ENTP-Ne Needs, and Rousseau

Rouseau states a lot of what I said, but not in a convincing
enough way. He says beyond the natural needs to eat, sleep, etc and
well he puts reproduction as well. Oh, this is in the state of nature.
He says beyond that we don’t have
other needs. Just that as society grows we start to see more trivial
things as needs. luxery, entertainment. (friendship he says?).

He says this is the basis for inequality because it means as we have
more, we require more, and so we continue needing to compete with
each other.

He goes on to say that as people organize their lives around artificial needs
they become inauthentic even with themselves.

He says origin of civil society wa when a man enclosed a plot of land
and convinced people that it belonged to him.

So then, as I said, freedom is not about what you can gain for yourself.
It is about who you can become.

It is important to know what is authenticity especially if you want to
be in a relationship. At least for me, I do much better with people
when I am in a place where I know and like who I am.
It seems society has dictated a lot of my needs, including and maybe
especially sexual needs. The “need” to masturbate.
The “need” to have as much sex as possible.

Maybe for some people these are needs in that they don’t yet know how
to be happy without them. However, if I d, then it would make them
not needs.

Until I can let go of these “needs” I feel like I will never have
the true authenticity and I guess self respect that comes with that
for me to be truly confident. Without true confidence, I guess I will
always suffer from sex drive issues, social anxiety etc, and feelings
of inadequacy which would lead to not doing well with women.

I feel like if I could be authentic, doing what I really want to be
doing, I would feel whole. It would have to be authentic independant
of praise from others. Just based on what I think I “should” be doing
where “should” is based on what I think is morally the right or best thing
for me to do, not what seems most fun. Fun should follow.

Learn perfect self control, let go of Ne

Green tea
exams tmr
code geass last night

Ok, so today I was with Ivan studying and a girl flirted with me and I
mistook it for condesention and kinda regretted it after

At work I see the INTJ with the really nice body and I guess face too
and I just feel like I have nothing to offer and at this point with watching
porn for the last few days I feel at the point of not caring.

I was washing dishes and thinking, it’s almost like I’m ready to give up.

I can’t even feel the attraction (cold be cause of the porn and my state in
life though) and it feels so shitty, like I’m missing out on that part of
my life and am destroying my mind because why not if I can’t get anywhere

Then I thought, no I need to not destroy my mind. I need to do the exact
opposite. I need to become better, healthier. I need to figure everything
out. I need to correct my sex drive and outlook, at the biological level
if nessesary.

I don’t remembe how I got to the next point but I thought about going back
to having the awesome focus I had back in Seneca(at least in the first year lol
and maybe the last).

I don’t know if I was thinking about it for the sake of the money,
or if it came out of seeing how I devolved into watching porn again.

Oh, I remember thinking I need to sleep more and be healthy in every
way possible and make it a routine I can’t break Then I thought,
the thing keeping me from sleeping is just my search for novelty.

So I thoug, wow, so this search for novelty, this Ne that everyone
in the MBTI land is praising as something I should just let run free,
actually ruins my sleep? So then, maybe it isn’t so important that
I keep it unhinged at all times. Maybe I need to control it.

Sure this guy on youtube is telling me to watch humor for Ne before bed
and maybe that would HELP, but the fact is I would be watching humor
instead of what I REALLY want to do which is surf the internet endlessly or
watch all of code geass and then porn lol.

What I did in college and before was I decided that my natural inclination
towards constantly seeking novely was actually in excess and was
like a drug like behaviour and that it needed to be controlled
(not eliminated, just tempered).

I did this by creating times of the day where I could play very vanilla
games and watch tv shows, and maybe daydream about other things, and
other times when could not. I would not deviate from those times.

I also didn’t allow myself to focus to deeply on other life paths like
becoming a musician etc. Other things that could end up taking up
my focus. I decided if I did those things it woudl have to be after
I finish school and get a job(heh, I only ended up wiht a part time
job unrelated to my feild so in a way I never stuck to the plan.

Anyway, it worked out extremely well both in college and before
when I was studying for a personal trainer exam.

I realize that in that part of my life, I wasn’t bored out of my mind.
I wasn’t suffering. I found it hard to really get passionate about
the work(partly because I decided passion would only be distraction and
partly becaue I just had other dreams). Still though, I enjoyed myself
the majority of the time.

See the way the brain works, (anyones brain I guess) is that if you do
and accept doing boring shit for long enough, you will find the fun in the
boring shit. It’s basically mindfulness. You gain more dopamine receptors
and are able to feel the enjoyment in what was boring.

If you shut yourself in your room for a whole day you would find yourself
fiddling with whatever was around you. This is because you are
becoming aware of the fun that could be had in just fiddling.

So really, by trying to seek out more and more novelty, of which there is
an endless supply, all we do is make it harder to enjoy ourselves.

Succuming to this feeling of wanting novelty, is paralell to succuming
to the feeling of not wanting to exercise (if you feel that). The more
you succumb to it, the weaker and more needy you will become. The harder
it will be for you to do simple tasks. The less FREE you will be.

Get it? See I am not simply in school and looking for work so that I can
meet women. I also want freedom. What is freedom though? Do you think
freedom is being able to have sex with whoever you want?
I disagree because that could infring on their freedom to have or not
have sex with you.

Do you think freedom is the ability to go or see or experience novel stimuli
whenever you want? I feel most people would say this is freedom, but I
disagree. See you could have that freedom, but if you always have the
need to experience those things and that need for the novelty constantly
overcomes you then you are not free.

Freedom comes from self mastery. Being able to be whoever you want to be
whenever you want to be it. To be able to be happy when you want to be
happy for instance, or at least to be able to work toward that feeling.

So what is with Ne and being a blessing and a curse?
Well I guess it works until it doesn’t. It works until there is too much
in the world for us to get into. Until there is drugs, and porn, and an
endless sea of information. Once we’ve reached this point, we should also
have reached a point where we can control our impulses because our impulses
are based on survival, on scarcity, which is not what we have now.

What we have now is the chance to evolve. It could be that evolving the brain
evolves the genes and the body. We will find out when we get there.

See if something is keeping me from sleeping. That is, keeping me from
being healthy. Then IT must have limits on it’s ability to aid my well

I’ll just note, after a lot of boring stuff, to be able to sit down and watch
an anime feels so good. Which to me means the dopamine.

Also, as soon as I get in this mindset of taking control of myself, I no longer
feel weak and at the mercy of my emotions. As soon as I let go of Ne and
decide I need to just be ok with boring, I feel so much more confident. More
confident, stronger. I feel powerful. Like I can do anything.

Self Mastery, Mind even more than body, is what becomeing supernatural,
having super powers, is all about for me. It even feels like it.

So what do I want to do.

I thought of just going for programming again but I realized what is the
point. For one, it would suck if worst case senario 2 years down the
road I still can’t get work.
It would even suck if I did get work because I would be limiting myself
as to what else I could do to possible get paid to do something more
meaningful to me. Meaning is indipendant of novelty which is another reason
why fun has no place in job decisions. The job could be boring and not
fun in some areas but still be the most meaningful thing you could be
doing in the long run.

So I decided I would continue with school and lean more towards political
science snd philosophy because I feel that is an area where I can actually
make a huge difference.

I mean making a difference is good for two reasons.
1 is that most likely I can make more money that way.
2 is that I will make a difference either way which beats going into
programming and not making money or a differce, or making money but
never feeling fulfilled.

So I choose to go into the poliscie stuff but with focus, not seeking
novelty, and a “fun time”.

See, the more you seek out a fun time(novel stuff), the more fun time
eludes you because you just grow weaker. The more you just do what you
think will make a difference in the world, the more the fun will come
with it.

So my plan is to stick to that. Also on the side I want to study chinese
by reading and writing out phrases, only those I see in the software
etc that I use often so that I will always be using it. For speaking
and listening I might have to do a serious srs thing again and I can
do it.

So I will put a lot of my focus into perfect body habits.
Then into school.
Then into language.
Then if I had to pick oneother thing it might be writing or music I don’t know.

I feel like in letting go of Ne, of trying to get it all for my Ne, I will
actually become more open and enjoy life more. Only when I’m not trying
to though, so it will be tricky. Either way I should always feel more
powerful and in a higher state of mind knowing that I have a path. The path
I feel is most meaningful. That with my superpowers I can do anything and
with them, this is what I have chosen to do.

Can’t really beat that.

I also remember meditating with resident eveil soundtrack music playing as
well as other cool memories like that. With all the rigidity I had going
on, I feel like I lived more, experienced more, tnan if I were in a
constant state of trying to find something more fun to do.

Might as well start on whatever seems most meaningful(not fun). If
somethign comes along that is truly more meaningful to me etc, then
sure I can switch but otherwise I will achieve things that need to
be achieved.

Ne-Ti Career Idea – Philosophy

I have been doing philosophy on this blog from the start I believe.

My idea right now is that, well, for some reason making a living as an artist is said to be hard to do. First I want to think about what possible reasons there could be for this. One is that most artists are just not that good for some reason and that if they were all so able to move people emotionally they would all be able to make money. Another is that people create so much art without being paid for it that it’s almost like art is some sort of by product of certain people and doesn’t need to be supported.

At the same time though, certain types of…well, entertainment, are making money like videogame streaming and possible other types of streaming.

It could be that some of the types of art people are doing are just no entertaining anymore and people just need to find more entertaining styles of art.

Btw if it is that artists are just not good enough then two ideas: one is that people might need to experience and enjoy more of other artists art and be cool with learning from each other more. The other is that maybe artists need to study psychology more to get better at making people feel different emotions.

after this post I’m gonna look up what types of art and entertainment are making money, just because, but I have another idea that could work for me.

The other idea is that all of this work I’ve been doing has been very productive and that if I figure out a solution to this problem of mine I’ll probably help a lot of people. If this is the case then I just need to stick it out and I need to just learn even more and think even more about our world and reality and different perspectives and sciences. This is an emotional path in a way because I am putting everything into finding a way of life that will allow me to be happy.

It is emotional but drawing on and developing my problem solving skills and so this is another thing about emotion that might be underestimated. As well it might be that this level of thinking, in the pursuit of happiness, is actually what I want to be doing with my life. If that is the case then I have learned that it could help to read other peoples though (which I already do a lot of) to help me attain this happiness, by adding more view points and thinking techniques to have I can draw from. As well it’s important for me to have high standards about what I want. As high as possible and never settling, but also be able to see what I have and enjoy that in the meantime.

hmmm, now I’m looking up info on other entertainment. It seems like the business model is a huge part of where the success can come from, as well the new business models that become available with the new technology. For instance, the only reason people pay video game streamers is because that business model exists. There are other business models as well, a lot of them based on donation, that work. I kind of feel like the evolution of business model could stem from and cause the evolution of society and human morality.

I guess business models might be psychological in nature, meaning the way you present your service, how you explain what they are paying for (piece based, time based, etc), may enlighten people, morally, to a different extent, based on the dimensions of your business model. If this is the case that I am in the right field.

Exploring Art forms

Comment on a blog

This hit home for me as well! I have been thinking lately that I might need to do things more focused on emotions and ideas, especially art. As you said it feels like some art forms, although efficient in terms of expression, can be draining. For me, writing is awesome WHEN an idea strikes me. However, if I have to sit down and write something just because it’s gonna be hard. I want to explore drawing because on the other hand with that I can just start with a reference and work from there. They can both tell a story, they just use different methods. Another pair I noticed is between song writing and just singing. With singing I definitely feel full after every time I do it, where as with producing songs, the song will be good but I usually only work on it for a short while because I lose steam. Well I’m into MBTI and socionics and there are concepts like Ti and Te which could explain part of this like needing a reference or a muse vs getting energy from seeing a blank page. I liked this post.

So I’ll continue from this and say that art might also be good in that it is another way of communicating an idea, but it’s doing it in a way that is iunno, I guess a more efficient way depending on what you are communicating. It just doesn’t take much effort to see what drawing is about, it’s an image. For an ENTP it can be both beautiful and a way of expressing my ideas. This could be good.

Well I guess I can also write(or draw?) to music.

I also have a theory that emotions(especially those felt through art) evolve WITH the evolution of understanding of the universe and reality and beyond, at least for some if not all. The more outlandish our emotions <- -> more outlandish drawings <–>more outlandish thoughts on what is possible.

Another way of looking at this is to say that each art form may have an inspired side and a therapeutic side.

The inspired side is the stuff that just comes to you without thinking about it initially and that drives you to create.
The theraputic side would be stuff were you are using the skill or talent of the art form but for more therapeutic reasons like just singing along with a song because it feels good.

Or it could be, because from singing other songs I eventually add to it, that I just need a reference, something to start with and then from there I take it further and in different directions.

Another note, like singing, I feel that drawing is encouraged by Fe, the idea that I could one day show off what I’ve drawn. However, Fe would be even more important for drawing than for singing because singing has a physical component which is psychologically beneficial in its own right.

Writing it seems is almost like, it doesn’t reach the external world. I often am thinking up scenarios for different events in a story-like format. As well I tend to view my life as a story. However it seems there is a difference between singing and drawing which are both automatically sharable and appreciable and relatable, and a story which might be more personal and self-indulgent. Not to say I want write my stories, just that they feel like the kind of thing to share mostly with people close to me. Or maybe they require use of other art forms to give them life.

Another thing is that it feels like Ne takes in ideas which then charge Ti(or Fi in the case of an ENFP). Then once  the auxillary function is charged to a critical max in a form of art, it is called inspiration and it will be the production of more of the same and eventually and evolution of those ideas.

For instance you hear enough GOOD music, eventually you will have ideas of your own. Look at enough good art and eventually you will have ideas of your own. I don’t know if it is about having a reference or that and seeing ways to improve on the ideas you took in(this could be it).

Another things I realized is that, well for most of my life I’ve been searching for a way to live the type of life of adventure that I have seen in video games. I just realized now that the experience I saw, of the video game stories, is something that can only happen in video games. I mean, I guess I still have hope that there is more out there. However, it’s just, these games were created by peoples imagination. What I loved about the games was the idea, even if it was so intense that it inspires me to want it for my life, it makes sense to appreciate that these feelings are the result of someone who created this thought experiment.

So I feel like, I might enjoy it if I could also create some of these myself.

I keep coming back to games because they are taking a lot of art forms and putting them together plus it’s like another reality you get to explore based on the logic you program.
Now taking what I learned about how Ne-Ti works, it makes sense that my inspiration will come from seeing GOOD games. A lot of GOOD games, and also they need to be at my level, easy to make. After this I should become motivated by the ideas that provoke my Ti and then if I have easy access to the source code I can start making changes and expose myself to those changes. Then, just like with how my music production flow works, I need to expose myself to my creation to inspire myself to add new things to it. Each time I expose myself to something interesting I am seeing it from a new perspective and so I get new insights on what would make it even more fun.

See for the longest time my thing was, figure out how to make enough money so that I can travel and live as if in a video game. Now I’m wondering if what would really make me happy is to take video game ideas further, intrigue myself, create another world to explore. Things like generating randomization could make things very interesting as well, but even beyond that, I feel like just the experience of certain things gives an experience. Sure you could say why don’t you just use your imagination, but then the whole point of ART is that there is a difference at least in intensity between the real and the imagined experience and so we seek to make real, our visions.

I may enjoy and/or need to just generally combine or balance the emotional and logical sides of my Ne. Feeding both of them constantly. For instance the most I’ve enjoyed programming was when I did it with music on. Although I guess in a way that music is partly feeding Si through the dopamine and serotonin pathways.

Following the Cognitive Funtions for Career choice Ne-Ti-Fe

Ne is the most obvious one, it’s the head in the clouds, or pattern noticing, etc type of style and it is focused on things that impact the external world etc. I don’t think I need to say much about this, at least not now.

The difference between Ti and Te is very important in career choice at least for me and even just for education and just knowing what my strengths are and where my interest comes from.

I feel like Fe hasn`t been stressed enough in it`s importance for careers. People seem to assume if you have Ne and Ti then you could do all the math and programming etc and so you can do anything. However, for me, because Ti is focused on my inner world, it doesn’t motivate me to produce anything, so I feel like what motivates me to produce is Fe.

I have been able to enjoy programming but the part I would enjoy most would be when I got to print actual words to the screen. It made the work seem human to me and this is important.

I mean, I have my own interests but many of them like language and sexuality are based on being social.
Then I feel I have the ability to be interested in a project if I am working with other people and contributing to something in this way. I could even do programming if I was doing it in a pro-social way.
Then there is writing and teaching which I enjoy especially when I get to express my own ideas.
So I wonder if maybe I should be focusing on something like technical writing and writing in general or if I should

hmm, so something just happened lol

I went to the gym as usual but I realized I just couldn’t stop thinking about my situation. Just wanting a job, wanting the ability to support myself, and it taking so long to get it. I then realized I was in a kind of loop of thinking about this and my workouts were suffering because I wasn’t sleeping properly because I just stay up thinking about these things. So I decided instead of continuing with weights I would just do a jog.

After the jog the more relaxed perspective has slowly been coming back to me.

First I realized, if I just want to support myself, I might as well settle for whatever I can easily get like security jobs or maybe personal training jobs.

Then I started thinking about the situation from the larger picture which is that we have this technology being built that is supposed to help us but it seems only the people who are into technology get those benefits. Also in general everyone is in a competition for work, when we are supposed to be a society working together to make a better life for all of us and we are failing in that it seems.

It makes me feel like the contract we entered into as a society was not for the good of us all but just the good of the individual. “How can you help me, because if you can’t you are expendable”·

After a nice jog ı am seeing that big picture and seeing that just supporting myself might not be enough for me. I’m seeing that I want social relationships, love, harmony, peace, joy, etc. That is what I want for me and everyone else. I’m definetly not willing to work and worry intensely over something as fickle as being able to move out. What would be the point. It’s a dead end, that mentality, that I would be free if I could just move out. I feel that true freedom comes from first knowing what is truely worth pursuiing, or at least what is not, and freedom comes from the mindset of putting passion/love/happiness first. When I am focused on the idea that moving out will bring me some sense of freedom, it’s focusing on lack because the reality is that I am not moved out and will not be for a while and so seeing it as being where my freedom lies is really not the right mindset. this is not the same as the mindset of making the world a better place which is a mindset that is not based on the view that one is in a place of lack and needs to work out of it, and also it is not based on the idea that one is not even free and needs to work to become free. The reason I have not moved out is because there are much more important things for me to focus on. I guess sometimes I get distracted by that when I see all the sex I am not having but really that is more a function of living in a society that needs more people to focus on making the world a better place.

Basically, to not have anything more important to focus on than moving out is a recipe for disaster for me because it means not believing in the things i really see as important and focusing on things that are really not. if i actually did move out after finding another job, well for one i would have less time to work on the important things but iunno, would i even feel a sense of freedom, if i have always been focused on way larger things than cars, homes, etc. i feel like i’m just not that type of person and so having those niceties would not be satisfying. thats not to say i wont one day want and achieve them, it;s just that if i do things out of order by working shitty jobs to pay for something i dont ned yet while sacrificing time and energy that could be spent pursuiing the things that would really light me up, i am acting in a less efficient manner

As well, focusing on emotion will create stronger attraction which will automatically create opportunities to work with other people. However, I can’t focus on this aspect if ı want to be truely authentic and inspired enough to have an impact.

now what I want to focus on, what I want to achieve, I feel is something Ive always been focusing on and wanting to achieve, which is…well many things, one is a more adequate understanding between all people as part of an attempt to promote human wellfare, another is the exchange of ideas, and another is the exchange of emotional ideas and the other is the exchange of sexual ideas.

most if not all of these can be categorised as spiritual pursuits in one way or another although maybe spiritual as the wrong ring to it. so these are things that i want to do and i dont care who else will support me because i am intrinsically motivated to achieve these things. so what i need to ask myself is, are these things important enough that i could sacrifice years of my life going without certain things? would they promote a sense of self respect within myself?

It seems like much of the creativity Ive been using throughout my life has been based on creating better understanding about life in general and better and different ways to think and to be. stories were important for a time but now i feel like i would be better off creating my own and exploring what i can discover in doing so. iunno i just feel like, freedom for me is when i can see my own goals are more important than anything anyone else could grant me. it feels like that is what i need to be happy. to find a way not to be content but to be increasing in happiness and love through only my own intrinsic desires.

so going to meditate in a temple is not enough. i`m looking for epic improvements in my life but through things i actually find epic, instead of through things that it seems anyone could do. things like language and psychology and fitness but also things like music and creative writing. these are things that can be epic to me if i explore them and discover things. none of these are things people would say are super in demand in the working world, however, they are also things that a person can achieve all on their own for the most part. to be free then, would mean to strive for something epic in these areas without ever looking back at the car or house i could have had otherwise. so its about realizing that if im so motivated towards these things, there must be a reason, they must be good for me, and obviously better than the things that would equate to houses or cars. so these things im motivated to do then must be the things that if i kept doing them i would improve at a very fast pace and it is most likely that these would be the areas were i would be able to become an authority. maybe not in each area individually but in some holistic sense. then either people would recognize this achievement, or if not, i wouldn’t care, because i would be living because i would have developed these skills that make me happy. anything else would just be extra.

Quality > Quantity especially for ENTPs who have such a broad range of interests

Now another way to look at the job situation as by finding way to
expand my options.

What do I want to have as options for jobs.
I will need a portfolio for each thing I want as an option.
As well, all those things can function as a portfolio on their own.

So I can apply something like the bird stone technique here.

Instead of focusing on quantity in each area, I can focus on quality in
each area and then when they are put together I will have the quanitity as

So instead of trying to upload a bunch of covers I really only need to upload
one two or maybe three really good ones.

Same with acting.

Same with humor


So I can take my time in each area, doing as many takes and adding
as many ideas to it, until I get the one perfect take.
On top of that, in doing something with as high quality as possilbe
I will learn new skills and knowledge that will make doing subsequent things
at such high quality easier to do.

So what Dan said is partly true. About mastery of something leading to everything
being easier. However I don’t need to master a huge thing. For example,
I don’t need to master all of piano. I can master just one song.
Same with singing, acting, etc.

So this is lateral mastery.

I can put everything into one small project and make it really really good.
Maybe change my mind along the way about what I actually want to make in
that area if I get inspired in anoter way. Then I can just keep imrpoving
my idea as I work towards it until eventually I get there.

I can see a paralel here in how my fitness has been going. I’ve
obsessed about different things as I went along but I’ve kept getting better
and with more knowledge.

Then I wouldn’t even have to worry about quality because if that one thing I
do is awesome enough I will be able to attract other people to help me with
any other ideas I want to work on afterwards.

This is something I guess I could apply to any feild. It’s just a philosophy
switch, and I might be able to make it. Focus on quality and only laterally
on quantity and hope you stand out. I feel like I would stand out if I did
things this way. Way more than I stand out going only for quantity, and
maybe with the same amount of work if you think about it. If you look at
how long I’ve been on youtube, how much time I’ve put in, but just in
bad quality stuff. If I did the same with high quality stuff I might do

Again, when it comes to fitness and the body we all are focused on quality
just naturally because you only have one body to make awesome as possible.
For me the results speak for themselves. I’ve often thought, if I put the
same effort I put into my body, all the research and experimenting,
into something like programming, I would be amazing at programming.
However, the story online is if you want to be seen you gotta be prolific
which to me means you need to have done a whole bunch of different projects.

Iunno, I’m starting to think what would work better in terms of my learning
and in terms of becoming more attractive in that feild, would be to focus
on one project that I slowly add to over time for as long as I live.

Not sure what project it would be, probably a game though, and I’d just
do it in a modular way.

Then I can do the same with music. I write one song, that I just keep adding
to forever. One story the same way.

I then put all these things together and what comes out is what comes out.
I can then break the song into pieces or whatever but by refering to it and
viewing it as one song that I just add to, I keep from the feeling of needing
to complete something and so I will learn revel in the reward of just adding
to something instead of to completing something just to say I’ve completed
another something.

I feel this is a more holistic philosophy.

If I use youtube though, I guess for the sake of the audience it would be
better to have separate channels with just links, so as I upload UPDATES
not individual things, people would only see updates for the stuff they
already like. Also the links will allow people to see the other stuff I
have going on.

It feels almost risky to have just this one thing that I keep adding to, like
if I lose it or don’t finish it or if it’s destroyed then I’ll have nothing
to show for all my effort. Iunno maybe that is part of what got me in that
quality of quantity mindset. It’s like a scarcity mindset I realize. The idea
that you should have a swarm of stuff instead of just one good thing.

Bruce lee fears the man who practised one kick 1000 times.

So if I do something on youtube like a channel about MBTI, in will be like
one series dealing with one topic with as high a quality as possible. I would
rather 1 minute of high quality that takes a month to produce than an amount
of low quality.

People want high quality. I want high quality.

I feel like people would be more impressed even, if I showed them 1 minute of
a work in progess, if that minute was high quality. Than if I showed them
any amount that was lower quality.

I bet also that I could enjoy doing the smallest aspect of something, at
a very high level, even if it’s not the completed vision, especially if I
am to say the vision will never be completed, but will be in a constant
state of evolution and growth.

Also that it will have an interconnectedness with the other things that I
do and maybe that too will be in a constant state of evolution and growth.

Things I want to do with my productivity, and way to use Ti

So now I guess I’ll list the things I wanna do with my time

I guess I really just need like 5 hours every day

Learn Chinese 20 minutes a day
exercise & stretch
I kind of think I’d like to get into archery again

creative stuff


video game? —- this would allow me to do creative and possibly
work stuff at the same time and get a portfolio thing going.

work stuff

Create Portfolios for different areas or one specified area

Going to meetups will be something I can put on a resume
or portfolio, especially if I were to start a blog, but this
might be just adding more than I need.

If my focus should be how I can contribute then I need to focus on

I just thought of a way of problem solving if my theories would work
or not. If I have evidence that the basic idea of it has worked in
another way in my life, then it might work else where.

For instance, creating a video game so that I’m combininf work
and music, and story all in one, is the idea of killing more
birds with one stone? Will that work?

Well for my fitness goals, doing full body, it has worked so far

With school the option of cognitive science allowing for philosophy
and psychology as well as electronic stuff, this has also worked out
so far.

Infact this is somethign creating a video game would be able to be
applied to so I should consider that if I want to create a portfolio.

I mean if I made a really cool videogame, cool on as many levels as I
can think of, not only would it stand out without me having to be
a pro in any area, but it might be way more fun. Also it would set me up
as an authority on this new way of thinking.

Another way I’ve been killing  multiple birds is through using fl studio
intead of just playing piano so I get to have any style of music I want
and any instrument, right there.

I guess just having all these different things that I can combine is
like, I never get bored, I can always do something else and add it to
whatever I’m working on. It’s like the ultimate Ti way of living. I’m
building up this network of ideas and just stringing them together
in the ways that they fit. Instead of working on any one goal. There is
no goal, just expressions of Ti.

Just like how my blog posts are simply me writing thoughts as they come
to my mind…well as I try to solve problems yes, but still the idea
is that if I can do the work, I can also be weaving together these
connections as I go along and learn more.

CHaracter idea, person who has philosophy that everyone actually
wants to die based on our organic “propencity?” to die, and so he
decides he wants to help everyone die.

Story idea the undulating feilds that twist and fall back on each other
that kids approach and don’t know what to think.

The story idea of a world were math is different because physics changes
maybe when a person consiously uses math to interpret reality.
So trying to count 10 oranges you will actually have to count and
write it as elevent because at number 9 and phantom identity of 10 will
appear so you will have 11 in total but only while counting, you can’t
actually utilize the extra orange, or at least, you can’t eat it.

ofcourse an important motivational thing is to start small. So like I
do with songs, I need to do with any video games I make. Just learn
one new thing each day and add it to the game and with story behind it,
or something like that.

Or maybe solo stuff isn’t the best use of my time iunno, but I at least
need to put something online every day that shows my ability to work
and get somehting polished completed.

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